Next stop, Hollywood!

Let me guess. You've probably always wondered what Dave Cloud gets at the store. I used to be in your shoes, man. But what if I told you that I recently got a new pair of shoes?

Due to the burgeoning success of Taytyme the blog (somebody told me they read it once), Taytyme the guy has decided to branch out and create Taytyme the show. It will be called "REALITAY TEE-VAY" and be on HBO. Each episode will be about 10 minutes long and be presented in little two-minute vignettes. There will be regular features like "Cloud Watch," where a camera secretly follows Dave Cloud into the grocery store to find out what he eats. In the segment called "Guess Who's Talking Shit About Keith Lowen," everyday people that you know will say funny things about Nashville's premier bass personality. You didn't know that they thought that too! Of course I'll conduct man-on-the-street interviews that elicit confounding answers to life's difficult questions, and we'll find out "Who's Getting Douged at the Red Door" and "Where's Andy Willhite Sleeping?"

For the pilot episode, we'll film a game show segment called "Betting on Bones." We'll get a few high-rollers (like the Pink Spydrz or something) to place high-dollar bets on what jam the Bones Explosion will be kicking when our cameras roll up to the 5 Spot on Sunday afternoon. "I got 500 on Dead Flowers!" "I'll see your Dead Flowers and raise you House of the Rising Sun!"

What do you think? I know I'd watch it, even if only for the dreamy host. You guys should leave ideas for other segments in the comments! Oh, and just so you know, Professor Cloud bought a 20-ounce Mountain Dew and two boxes of Nilla Wafers.